Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Amani is One Month Old

never have i felt one month would be like one year. with amani being premature, needing constant observation, being no six, being a baby when mummy has reached her 40s, its been very tiring. while i know people go - enjoy while it lasts - i find myself doing countdowns to her first month, and second, and sixth and her weaning and cutting down bottles and sleeping through the night and sitting down.

after amani's first 2 weeks, which were quite difficult, as she would ask for her bottle every hour and she wouldn't sleep and didn't like the cold, it started to get slightly easier. she still sleeps better during the day, maybe as its warmer, but the gap between bottles at night have gotten longer. she can get 3 - 3.5 hours, once even getting a good 5 hour gap between her bottles. but there've been days where she regress and go back to 2-hourly bottles and those days scare and stress me out. i should get naps during the day to cover the lost of sleep but during the day amira would require my attention so i'm neither here nor there, at the moment.

other than her feeding & sleeping schedules, amani is actually pretty easy to handle. she's ok with her bath and diaper changing. she was wonderful when i had my postnatal massages - she slept through the 2.5 hours and then some. she's undisturbed by the hecticness of abangs in between school. she slept through an outing we had one weekend, from the time we left the house til we reached home 3 hours later. yes, she's really good but i pray the feeding schedule would normalise soon.

amani had her check-up a few days after she turned one month old. alhamdulillah, she has put on weight. she was 2.69kg when she was born and lost a bit during her stay in the special care nursery but has put back on some during her first month. she now weighs 3.6kg. i thought amani be getting her first immunisation but her pead said she will only start on her second month check-up. at her first month visit, she was only given general check up.

alhamdulillah, she's growing real well and healthily in her first month. a vast improvement from the frightening first week she had.

Friday, July 07, 2017

Hari Raya Aidilfitri 2017

this year's syawal was very low-key. all the preparations were settled way before raya. everyone's bajus we bought before the fasting month began, rendang was cooked mid-way through the fasting month, cookies were ordered in advance. and well, basically that's it. i wasnt going to cook, i wasnt going to dress up, i wasnt going to actually do much except

the week before raya was hectic. with the delivery, amani's admission, my hanging out ouside the special care nursery for 2 days waiting for breastfeeding-calls and waiting for amani's ultimate discharge. she was finally discharged the day before raya and we were juggling 6 under-12s on raya eve.

we put the boys to work, though. they cleaned the guest toilet, cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the whole of the downstairs floor, wiped every single surfaces, vacummed between the sofa seats and helped set up the dining table for guests.

it was drizzling on the morning of raya, i went down early and went into the kitchen immediately. i cooked beef rendang a couple of weeks before raya and i had to only heat them up for us to eat throughout the day. hubby helped make nasi impit the day before, they were thrown into the fridge to harden and to wait for it to be cut after he returns from aidilfitri prayers, as with the lemang he bought the day before. the only 'cooking' i had to do was to heat up the prepared & bought kuah kacang from brahim.

hubby and the boys went to the moque for aidilfitri prayers while i stayed at home to get amira and amani ready, as well as put the food (whatever that we have) on the table for us to devour.

when they returned, we took our customary raya family photo and had our salam-and-duit-raya session.

after we had a good meal, we went over to a neighbour's house. we hope to do more houses but we were still getting around with a new baby around so we couldn't this year. my family came over bearing food after lunch and hubby's friends dropped by towards the late afternoon. the kids were happily running around outside, after a month of very limited outdoor activities, they were super excited to be able to have a kick-a-bout in the garden.

i do miss cooking on raya eve and on raya morning, but i'll come back with a bang next year, insyaAllah. very quiet raya, actually. hopefully next year will be more hectic and full of screams and shouts and laughters, just how we like it.

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Engku Amani Safiyya

the baby's name came to me one fine day. i was hardset to name the baby 'adila' and loved ariff's suggestion of 'safiyya' but i was not keen of similar sounding ends for the two names. i badly wanted to keep the first name but could not find a good second name to go along with it, except safiyya.

then one day, i came across 'amani' and loved the combination of the two names, along with their meanings - hope and pure. so hubby and i decided on the names and made a pact not to tell anyone to keep the element of surprise, and to keep the boys from babbling to their friends and teachers. everyone was using the name 'adila' when mentioning the baby, so yeah...good that noone knew.

after amani's arrival, i did not see her at all, let alone held her for the first 24 hours. amani was admitted to the special care nursery for observation. on the second day, i had the opportunity to visit her in the nursery occasionally and started to breastfeed her. that night, the nurse would call me every time she woke up for a feed. amani slept quite a bit and drank very little the fist couple of days.

an overnight observation became 3 days and just when i thought amani would be discharged, the nurses informed me that she had jaundice, although very low, and was to stay another night in the SCN to get phototherapy treatment. alhamdulillah, the jaundice was detected early and the pediatrician started her therapy early on, as she needed only a day.

finally, after 5 days at the SCN, amani was able to go home with us, in time for Hari Raya. her final diagnosed for her stay in the SCN was 'prematurity'. i'm actually surprised she was considered premature as abangbee akmal was not even though he born at 36weeks & 2 days, only 2 days difference between amani & akmal. with amani being considered premature, there's a long list of things to monitor and to look out for - her breathing, her jaundice, her eating, her activeness, her sleeping schedule.

initially i was very stressed. i was tired and not sure if i could handle the monitoring. i was afraid i'd miss something and it would affect amani. my eyes were on her 24 hours a day. when she slept, i looked at her chest, i felt for her breathing, i shook her a bit to see how she responded. but after 3 days, she finally seemed settled and that calmed me down tremendously.

amani looked like a newborn the first week, she felt like a newborn for the whole week. finally she had the baby look after being home 3-4 days. she looks fuller and rounder now, not just all skin and bones, as she initially did.

her feeding schedule was all over the place but we're getting there. she would wake up every hour, every half an hour something, particularly at night, and sleep for hours during the day. but for the past 2 days she'll be awake on time, every 3 hours, drinking a good 2oz of milk everytime.

amani's siblings are estatic with her arrival. kakak is very welcoming and is not at all disturbed by amani's cries at night. her brothers are excited, as excited as they were when amira was first brought home. they are fighting to hold her but with premature condition, we dont allow any of them to hold her.

we're taking it one day at a time with amani, hoping she'd be on better schedule as the day progressed and that she'd put on more weight, insyaAllah.


the value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults - peter de vries

grown-ups never understand anything for themselves and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explainning things to them - antoine de saint-exupery
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