Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Amira's Second Month

it seems hitting the two month mark changed little miss pacak dramatically. the first is she's no longer little miss pacak but is now little miss botak. i wanted to shave off amira's hair for the longest time. her hair absolutely smells. i have no idea from where, from what, how and of what. but it just smells. we wash her hair every time we bathe her. she has no cradle cap, unlike her brothers, and her scalp has harden but it just smells. soon as we shaved off her hair and wash her head, the smell immediately became less. i stilll don't know from what, she doesn't perspire so what is the source. totally baffles me…

apart from the obvious change (a little too obvious since her rambut pacak is the first thing people notice about her), amira's also tone down her fussiness. she's still fussy and still screams the house down, but its tone down a wee bit now. she sleeps through the night, that little angel. syukur, yes i am. the scariest bit of being a parent of a little baby is that night feeding and lack of sleep. but after two months of being a zombie, amira put me out of my misery and all of the sudden chose to sleep through the night. she does get up for feeding still but she can sleep for 6-7 hours, which is good enough for me. her last feed would be around 10-10.30pm and she would get up around 5-530am. makes me never miss fajar prayers, alhamdulillah.

she's also putting on the pounds. at her last check up she's close to 5kg. amira's been getting her immunization at two places now - our regular pediatrician and at the government clinic as there's shortages of the triple antigen jabs. she's plump around her thighs and plump around her cheeks. akmal says she's carrying water in her cheeks and he'd like to poke her so that the water comes splashing out. ah abangbee…

amira's responding a lot now. she gurgles a lot at her brothers, laughs at the cot mobile and the pictures on her cot bumpers. she giggles at the telly and if someone startles her. she loves to play after her bath time and after her feed but she would only give you five minutes of her precious time. more than that, you're stepping over your boundaries and she'll let you know - loudly - how much she does not appreciate your presence.

car rides are a joy for amira, when the car is moving, at least. she's ok with her car seat - since she spends way too much time in it but she hates it when the car stops moving. she's ok with family outings too. she's familiarize herself with her stroller but prefers to be carried instead *reminder for me to buy a baby wrap soon* she's followed us to watch movies - 4 movies in fact. not bad for a two-month old.

amira's gets way too fussy when she hits her growth spurt. it has happened twice so far - once when she was learning to lift her head, the second when she was about to sleep through the night. but her fussiness lasts a day, two days then she would sleep to get over the lack of sleep she experienced during her growth spurt.

Monday, December 21, 2015

Year-End School Holidays 2015

this year's year-end school holidays feels somewhat fast yet slow. initially, with me still in confinement, able to do some things, unable to do others, it was not so easy. i needed some time to myself and amira as she was still clingy and fussy and drinks every 2-3 hours. the only was to get that was to find activities for the boys.

i enrolled asyraf and ariff into a school holiday programme at the nearby mosque. hubby sends them every morning, i would pick them up every evening. by that time, i could drive, limited to nearby places but still…could drive. amir goes for tuition 3 times a week. so i'm at home with akmal and amira. akmal's very independent. give akmal thomas and his friends and he's occupied the whole day. he's easy to handle. amir for half a day, is so so. he still disturbs akmal when he's bored but with no other brothers to back him up, akmal has to be his ally, so the disturbing is toned down by a lot.

this went on for the first three weeks of the school holidays. once the programme at the mosque concludes, i find myself concluding my confinement as well. so i'm more active and able to run around with the boys. i spent most of the time, post-confinement, preparing for the upcoming school year. there's books to be wrapped, bags to be bought, uniforms to be ironed, name tags to be sewn, shoes to be washed, stationeries to sorted. i felt like this year, the list became longer and time became shorter. its almost the end of the december and there's still so many things pending.

mental note to get everything done way ahead of time next year. by the first week of december, everything has to be all in order so that i can enjoy the school holidays too!

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Asyraf is Nine

i feel bad for asyraf on his birthday this year. its been a turmoil of a year for me and asyraf. he's been my target during my pregnancy. nothing he did was ever ok with me. he was too irritating, too noisy, too loud, too in the way, just too there. i couldn't stand the sight of him and could get angry at him just by looking at him. once i gave birth, however, like in the exact hour, the feeling all went away. i wish i could turn back the 9 months and take back how i treated him.

his birthday came when i was still in confinement. i was tired and cranky and not up to having anything or doing anything. poor asyraf. he had a great celebration last year, he wasn't expecting another this year but i guess he didn't expect this low-key of a day either.

dinner was planned, of course, as with other birthdays in this household. but other than that, no one really did anything. he got cards from his siblings, but that was after he asked for them. he got simple wishes from all of us before we all went back to our daily routine - me with amira, the boys with their thomas and hot wheels and the tv. the birthday boy spent the whole day in front of his ps3. asyraf also did not get his birthday present on his birthday - blame the father for that.

unfortunately, dinner plans did not materialize. it was raining heavily, coupled with it being a friday, we were not up to leaving the area. we went for a quick arabic dinner nearby. we made it up to asyraf with a birthday lunch the next day, after his morning football. surprise, surprise, his bff was also at the restaurant so guess that's good for asyraf.

happy birthday abang…may there be less dirtiness, less crying, less hogging of the remote control, less falling asleep in front of the telly, less screaming and jumping for no reason, less losing your stationeries, less losing your spectacles. and hope you get your present soon…

alhamdulillah, asyraf's biggest accomplishment this year, is finally being able to ride a two-wheel bicycle…

Saturday, November 21, 2015

One Month On…Mummy

amira turning one month means mummy has survived two-thirds of her gruesome confinement. its been so-so this time. tiring because of the old age, tiring because of the older boys, tiring because amira can be a handful. but at the same time, not too difficult because the older boys are in school, not too difficult because i'm alone with amira, not too difficult because i roughly know how to adjust my time and schedule to fit amira's.

food wise has been easy. preparing and marinating the salmon, chicken and beef beforehand, helps a lot. during the first month, i only had to chuck them into the oven and grab some veggies for a good meal. breakfast is my all-time favorite corn flakes. occasionally toasts. or maybe some boiled eggs. dinner is probably something hubby brings back on the way home form work or yet another oven-grilled meal or cereal or just fruits. after a long day, i'm just looking forward to being in bed and food is the last thing on my mind.

i had 10 days of massage. blissful 10 mornings. initially amira would sleep through the 2 hour period but towards the last couple of days she seems to be envious of mummy's alone time and would kick a fuss, prompting me to have her by myside when i had my massage.

i planned on breastfeeding, or at least try to, and managed to for a week but that was it. i was too stressed with the older boys around and i just cannot sit still with a cuddling baby for hours. after a week, it was fully bottle and formula for amira. alhamdulillah she's taken to the bottle easily and did not kick a fuss. feeding is a quick affair, and i was free to do other things once feeding is done.

i did not bathe amira the first month. in the morning, i would give her a sponge bath on the changing table. at night hubby would give her a bath. we still take ages to get her ready and with the older boys being an audience, it gets too much sometimes.

i do feel it takes longer for me to get back on my feet. sometimes i'm just too tired to get out of bed. i know, its the age catching up. it also takes longer to heal post-delivery. i still feel the epidural effect once in a while. hopefully once the confinement ends, or once i cross the two-month mark, i would be back to normal, insyaAllah.

Friday, November 20, 2015

One Month On…Amira

alhamdulillah, amira turned 1 month old yesterday. she's been pretty good the past month. she is taking all her brothers' traits one at a time, bit by bit. initially she was like ariff, sleeping a lot, sleeping through her bath time even. she also took on akmal's traits - asking for her bottle every 3 hours on the dot, akmal was 4 hourly though. now she's slowly becoming like asyraf - moody, fussy and crying out until someone carries her. i'm hoping that's just part of her growth spurt and she would grow out of it.

she's drinking more per bottle now. initially she could only take in 2oz + 1 oz. sometimes even less and some of the milk had to be thrown away. now she's taking in 3.5oz to 4oz. sometimes split into 2 feeds, sometimes all in one go.

amira had her one month check up yesterday. she's put on a whole kilo, she now weights 3.7kg. she's filling up at her tights and on her cheeks. the scar of her BCG shot is showing now, right on time per the nurse in the maternity ward.

amira is slowly recognizing faces and voices. she's able to stare into our faces a long time, showing she recognizes us. she's turning her head to follow voices, showing she recognizes us. she doesn't smile much, but is slowly showing her smirk a few times, here and there.

amira is the only one who loves being swaddled. her brothers would kick and punch their way out of the swaddles but amira could sleep soundly through the night (or through the next feeding) and not move a muscle being in her swaddle blanket. she used to sleep all swaddled during the day too but not anymore as she would perspire a lot if swaddled during the day.

despite being only a month old, amir's gone out a few times. we took her for a night drive one time when hubby had to get something from his office. she's also followed us for abangbee's graduation and then when abangbee had something on at hubby's office. there's also her one-month check up. she loves being in the car and being in her car seat. she's could sleep throughout and doesn't kick up a fuss. another of ariff's trait.

one of my favorite parts of amira is her hair…he spiky spiky hair. the nurses in the maternity ward first spiked up her hair when she was born and until now her hair would stand at attention and refused to be combed. we absolutely love it and she's been dubbed our 'little miss pacak'.

if there was one thing that i pray and hope and pray and pray hard that amira would change, honestly, is her 3-hourly bottle request. yes, its good because i can gauge timing and plan accordingly but waking up every 3 hours at night is getting very tiring. she's doesn't fuss much during night feeding, she cries, i wake up, change her diapers, prepare her bottle, put her down, give her the bottle and then she would fall asleep. no need to rock or pat or be all stressed getting her back to sleep, that bit she's really wonderful but its just so tiring. i've been sleeping through the night for over 5 years, to repeat the night feeding at this age, is very difficult. i know people say, during the daytime when your baby sleep you should catch up on your lost sleep but err…there's four others that require my attention. so when actually can i get this catch-up-lost-sleep moment?


the value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults - peter de vries

grown-ups never understand anything for themselves and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explainning things to them - antoine de saint-exupery
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