Sunday, May 23, 2010

That Other Work

i dont blog about work (the income earning one) much. why? cos its just work. dont get me wrong, i dont hate my 'career'. i do like working. with so many boys at home, going to work gives me the chance to 'get away from it all', just like going home gives me a chance to forget about work. i get a lot of comments about me not using my hard-earned education seeing that i went back to the working world as an administrative employee. they feel i should be a high-flying go getter. just because i have this paper titled 'master of science'.

sigh...again...siggghhhhhhhhhh. honestly, does it really matter? i like my job. i like doing filing. i like faxing. i like doing claims for people, keying in their leave, preparing their travel documents, preparing for events. i like. and i'm capable. isnt that more important. isnt that better than having approprite qualification for that kind of work but dont enjoy it and not capable.

i see people working late, working on weekends and i'm so not interested to be part of the crowd. i come in at 8:30am, i work, i go home at 5:30pm (ok...sometimes i do work late). that's it. i have time to fold the clothes, i have time to do the laundry, i have time to scream at my kids and i'm in bed in 9:30pm. i dont need to come in on weekends, i dont need to travel outstation, i dont need to entertain e-mails at 2am. great? heck yes...

after 4 years working in this company, i've been promoted once. it was a surprise, i wasnt expecting it. i seriously did not think much about climbing the corporate ladder. i do work, i do pretty good work and i go home. if people want to reward me, i'm ok with it. if not, its ok. i dont go around thinking 'i deserve this...i have the qualifications...i should be recognised'. alah relax lah. naik, naik...tak naik, takpe. life goes on. its just work, people.

i was one of the midnight oil burner group. i used to stay at the office til 10, 11pm. i've been one of those who come in before the sun rises and go home after the sun sets. i've done the 'working for 7 days a week, 30 days a month' song. that was before i had amir. now with asyraf, ariff and akmal to the list, i cant ever imagine doing the same. when i started planning for a family with hubby, we decided that he should be the one doing the climbing. he was open to the idea of having a stay-at-home wife (provided the ker-ching coming in was sufficient) and i loved the idea of stay-at-home mom. so i took a step back and hubby jumped double time. insyaallah, when he gives me the green light, i'll print the letter.

this kind of entry comes up every so often. usually once a year around may. why...cos that's B time hehehe. to K, thank you for the B and the L and especially the MB (what's that...the pmcare thingy lah).

my kawan for breakfast, lunch and kalau boleh, dinner. sibuk nak pregnant at the same time...

the people of tmo...honestly, the best department there is (pre-2009, that is)

eas of tmo enjoying our secretary's week luncheon

happening event of L37 - the potluck

new year, new department, new role, new place...

Friday, May 07, 2010

Akmal at 14 Months

its been ages since i wrote an entry about the boys' development. i mean, a long, long, desriptive entry. i'll probably do that soon, once i find the time to sort out which boy has done what. for now, i'm going to concentrate on my ickle baby akmal.

still not walking. i'm praying, he's practising. but still not walking. if he walks within the next couple of week, then he'll be just like his abang long. amir started walking when he was 14 & a half months, asyraf and ariff both walked when they turned 12 months. if akmal were to take his first step within this month, then my first and my last both would have the same milestone.

akmal loves attention. he loves when daddy calls him, when mummy cries out his name, when his abangs play around him. he can never be alone, he hates being alone. having said that, he hates the crowd. when we're with other people, he could cling to hubby or me, he would yell out when someone picks him up, he would get all teary when someone carries him. in school he's like that too. you'd think for a baby who spend his days at a nursery since he turned 2 months would be people-friendly but akmal's not. he's attached to 1 teacher, cikgu fakin, and would scream if another teacher carries him. pelik lah mal ni.

akmal loves to talk. he talks and talks and talks. of course nobody understands what he's trying to say but he'll talk his heart out. his mouth is non-stop making noises. a bit weird that all my boys talk a lot. i thought there'd be one who is quiet and reserved, but no. they all talk a lot, they all want to say their piece, they all want to be heard. we used to think amir was the talkative one and asyraf was the quiet one. we're right about amir, we're wrong about asyraf. now ariff joins in with his 'ni mok nyer's and 'bukan lah's and 'takkkkkk's and 'mok chop ni's. he has to have his say. and now, the icing on the cake, is akmal izzat's voice among the crowd.

akmal loves his towels. he'd hold a small towel when he's sleeping, when he's trying to soothe himself, when he's bored, he's sitting watching tv. there's no particular towel that he likes, he's easy...any towel. give him one and he'll start stuffing his face with it, he'll start playing pee-ka-boo with it, he'll start holding it with one hand and stuffing his thumb into his mouth (which is an indication that he's falling asleep).

akmal had no problem with his milk intake. initially it was a bit stressful with his dribbling but in terms of feeding, akmal has always been an on-schedule baby. he used to drink every 4 hours on the dot. a small 4-oz bottle would last 4 hours. exactly to the minute, he would cry out for another bottle. it was easy to plan for a good night's sleep around that. then the feeding became less until now, when he only needs 3 bottles a day. he would take his first bottle around 11am, another after lunch (to sleep) and another before he goes to bed at 9pm. in between he doesnt ask for milk and prefers to eat. unless he doesnt get his food, then he'd ask for another bottle. max 4 a day. that too, is not full formula. we only put 3-4 scoops in a full 9-oz bottle. counting the days til he finally stops bottle-feeding, hopefully its before he turns 20 months.

akmal is, honestly, an easy child to take care off. he can play on his own, he's easily comforted by the telly, he sleeps easily on his own and on schedule and now he's taken to matchbox cars which he would push with his index finger back and forth - that's entertainment to him and can easily last 20 minutes. 20 minutes of pure heaveness for mummy!

akmal latest pictures...bless you, baby boy. you're wonderful to have around...

Thursday, May 06, 2010

What The Hey...

there's a lot of statements that (to put it mildly) irk me quite a bit. sometimes i wonder, what goes through one's mind when they say it. people tell me not to bother much. try as much as i can, i put them aside but sometimes, they are just too irritating to push away. i get extremely pissed (ahh...there's a better word) when i get comments about my boys.

1. daughters
honestly, this statement is the highest in the list of 'statements that make me want to punch someone in the face'. i mean, like, so what?? so what that i have all boys, so what that i have no daughters. do i bother you in any way? do i make you feel like i want to kidnap your daughter for some reason and make her mine? do i cry and whine and hit myself? i dont plan to have the boys that i have, i wouldnt even know how. i wished for boys, but i dont plan for boys. i prepare names for girls as well as boys when i was pregnant, its all beyond our control isnt it? but i am blessed...blessed beyond reason that i have what i wished for and i'll never, ever in a single second doubt that my life is not complete with no girls in the house. now to those who keep insisting i try for a girl...2 words...up yours!!

2. favourite
this is another statement that confuses me beyond reason. its one thing to have someone ask me which of the 4 boys is my favourite, but its another to hear people tell me they have a favourite. i dont get how someone who rarely see my children, have absolutely nothing to do with them, can choose one to be a favourite. hearing the words 'asyraf is my favourite', 'ariff is my favourite' is enough for me to raise 2 fingers and poke them in the person's eyes. of course the word favourite is not the only word used, there are variants to the word but leads to the same meaning. sometimes i get 'i like akmal the best', the best out of what? or i hear the word 'kesayangan' like they love one more than the other. give me a break...the parents dont even choose, so why should you who mean nothing to the boys. the teachers who spend more time than anyone else with the boys, dont choose (except for kak yus who makes her preference very obvious) so why should anyone else. jeez...seriously!

3. kesian
ahhh...another word i so honestly hate. everything is kesian. the boys get sick, kesian. the boys fall, kesian. the boys come home scrathed and bruised, kesian. the boys get scolding, kesian. if you have nothing better to say, dont say anything. i can deal with 'what happened' or 'who did they fight with' or 'why are they scolded'. i can deal with suggestions of what to give or how to handle or how to deal with them. i can deal with all those except for 'kesiannnnn' and nothing else. do you even know what happened that you pity them so much.

4. orang tua kata
sometimes this 'orang tua kata' thingy is taken so way out of context. its extremely evident during pregnancies and during confinement. everything that an orang tua say, must be taken importantly if're not taking care of your body or your life or you want to die a slow and painful death. its like, listen or die!! i mean seriously. a comment like...i feel like eating sushi will be followed by 'ehhhh orang tua kata tak baik makan tu'. or if one eats pasta during confinement, people around her will gasp, saying how 'orang tua' says do not eat pasta. they even know what a sushi is or a pasta is. but when it comes to check ups and pap smears, they dont hesitate to push those aside. here you are on one side chastisicing someone for going against your 'orang tua' statements, accusing them of not taking care of their bodies, yet you dont even want to take care of your own health. big Hs in my opinion...

yes i know...let it go, dont take it serious, let them say what they wanna say. heard that, practised that...been there, done that. but why tell me to let it go...tell them to let it go. tell them to shut the heck up. tell them to get over it. if they didnt say all those, i wouldnt be pissed, would i?


the value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults - peter de vries

grown-ups never understand anything for themselves and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explainning things to them - antoine de saint-exupery
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